Dinner With Mr. Cole: Part V

When D.C had first gotten his Land Rover (the one that Dormitan had gone so gaga over) D.C had been pretty gaga for it as well and had been imperiously protective of it. So much so that for a time he had made people remove whatever foot wear they were donning before entering the car. This hadn’t lasted very long though (the only people who hadn’t complained about his odd and only recently adopted fastidious behavior were the groupies and the hanger oners) and so now even though he was still rather finicky about things like drinks and crumbly things like Oreos and Pringles he was more lax on things like cigarettes and sticks of cannabis sativa.
“Just make sure you use the friggin’ ash tray. That’s what it’s there for!”
And so with that being said, at this part of the story we find D.C. lying in the back seat of his car (his spotless black on black Chuck Taylor’s carefully removed of course) puffing away on a four incher of female hemp that he had managed to procure through a friend of a friend of a friend.
Brother needs to relax himself before what is sure to be an excruciating evening of being sucked up to and relentlessly useless questions on what it takes to be a great writer. Had been D.C’s justification.
And yeah sure, he had read the kid’s story and if he was to be honest with himself, it actually wasn’t half bad, in fact it kind of reminded him of his writing at that age. His main problem with it though was that it was way too optimistic. Dormitan still had this rosey red, fairy tale like outlook on life. Not that that was a problem mind you. It was just kind of…D.C. tried to think of a word that wasn’t juvenile…puerile maybe? And even though that still ended with “ile”, what the hell, puerile it was.
D.C. took a hit of the spliff, took another one and then since there was no one to pass it to, took another one. Sitting up slightly he took a peak at the dashboard clock, it blinked 20:09. D.C. blinked back, rapidly. He was late. Hurriedly putting out the hemp, D.C. rolled it in a plastic zip lock bag and stuffed it under the passenger seat. Shoes on and with a nimbus of sativa following him, D.C. headed for the entrance of Ninja.

*

Damn she was tall, D.C. thought of the waitress as he gave her the once over. And pretty when she smiled. He made it a point to smile back.
He was in the anteroom of the restaurant, you know that place where the check whether one has a reservation or not. Obviously he did.
“Welcome to Ninja Mr. Bryce. My name is Yuuka and I will be your Hostess for the evening. If you would be so kind as to follow me, your table is ready and just as you requested.”
Just as he requested. D.C.‘s smile was touched with irony at this. What a joke. Truth is, he had only asked for the ’authentic’ Japanese dining get up just to see if they would actually deliver. And they friggin’ had.
“Thank you. Thank you. Is my…um…dinner partner here yet?”
Yuuka pulled a face.
“Yes he is.”
D.C.’s smile widened just a bit.
“I sense a small hint of distaste…what’s he like?”
Yuuka’s eyebrows furrowed. She began to chew on her lips.
“I really can’t say.”
“Ok. I get that. But what if you like had to. Like say if it was a life and death situation and you had a crossbow being held up to your dog‘s head or something.”
“Well, if I absolutely had to-”
“D.C.?”
D.C. turned at the sound of his name.
“D.C. Bryce?”
A couple. An attractive one at that. Walking towards the exit, walking towards him and his 6 foot 3 inch tall hostess. They were dressed up and so they were clearly on a date. Left hands, ring fingers…married. It was the woman who had recognized him. Strapless black dress that stopped just shy of her knee, four inch black pumps that gave her a sort of sauntered, swaying gait, a small black imitation alligator skin clutch in one hand and her husband’s hand in the other.
Time to turn on the fan pleaser. D.C. raised his hand as if responding to a class role call.
“Guilty as charged.”
Followed by the inevitable,
“I’m a huge fan. I’ve read everything you’ve ever written. Even back when you were still just writing on your blog.”
“Thank you. Thank you. Much appreciated. Really. Those words are like an orgasm for my ears. I think I just came twice. Wait, wait, wait. That was a bit much, wasn’t it? I’m sorry, my apologies. Um…so who’s this?”
The woman then went on to introduce her husband (the two men shook hands) and to explain that it was their five year anniversary.
“Honest to God though, I still find it a miracle that we even made it this far.” the woman joked. From the expression on her husband’s face though, D.C. could tell that he didn’t find it all that funny. To counter this D.C. said something to the effect that although he was far from an expert, they looked happy and he foresaw another five, ten, twenty years or more to come.
The husband didn’t seem convinced.
“Um, Mr. Bryce?”
“Please call me Dom.”
The woman got a little giddy at that.
“Ok…Dom. Would it be okay if we took a picture with you? It would mean so much to me. And you know what they say the camera phone picture is the new autograph.”
“Sure. Of course. Take five if you have to.”
The woman then handed Yuuka her iPhone, asking her whether she minded (Yuuka took the camera saying she didn’t, even though she did) and then with D.C. standing between husband and wife, fake smiles abound apart for the woman’s, Yuuka took the picture.
After three of four clicks, the woman took back phone.
“Thank you soooo much.” the woman beamed up at D.C.
“No problem.” Yuuka answered.
“Thank you so much.” she said again. Then chuckling lightly, “I guess we should leave you to have your dinner. We’ve more than intruded I’m sure. God knows you didn’t expect to be ambushed by fans here. Am I right?”
D.C. merely shrugged.
Honey?” she then aimed at her husband, “I have to use the ladies, so how about you head to the car and I find you there?”
The husband began to protest but she insisted.
“Go. I’m not a little girl. I’m not going to get lost. I’ll only be a minute.” then to D.C. “It was suuuuch a pleasure meeting you. And thanx again for the picture.”
Their eyes met.
“Anytime.” was D.C.’s response. “Well, not anytime but you know what I mean.”
The woman smiled. Then turning to her husband, placed a hand on his arm.
“I’ll be out in a minute, ok?”
The man looked from his wife, to D.C. then back to his wife.
“Ok. Just don’t take too long.”
He watched as his wife headed towards the restrooms, then secure that she was far enough he shook D.C.’s hand, reluctantly, wished him a good night and headed for the entrance.
“Wow. Does that happen a lot?” Yuuka asked once it was just her and D.C. again.
“Pretty much.”
“Huh. Should I show you to your table now Mr. Bryce?”
“Dom, please. And actually, would you be so kind as to direct me to where the little boys wee wee room is? I have a sudden urge to empty my bladder. If that’s not forward a phrasing for ma’lady. And if it is, then my sincere apologies.”
Yuuka gave D.C. a knowing smile.
“No not at all. Just go down there till you hit the wall then turn left. You can’t miss it.”
D.C. took a slight bow,
“Thank you Yuuka. Am I saying that right? You are a Goddess amongst women. A Hera, an Athena, a-”
“Stop it Dom. The husband seems a finicky one so you probably don’t have that much time. Now go.”
D.C. was stopped in his tracks.
“That obvious, huh?”
Yuuka smiled.
“Just a smidgen, now go.”
And like a little boy sent to the shops for milk and eggs by his mother, D.C. went.